Wednesday, September 2, 2009

The True Meaning Of Being In Control

I assume most people on the Brazen Careerist network are go-getters, initiators, and passionate about their career and going after what they want much like myself. From a young age, I've been working and have sought out opportunities to learn and grow. It was always instilled in me that through hard work and sheer persistence, I could get what I wanted. It's what I was told and it's what I was rewarded out in the real world time and time again.

The difficulty arises when what you've been doing all your life no longer starts working through no fault of your own. For example, getting laid off due to a world wide economic crisis. You beat out all the other candidates to get your job, you work hard with rave reviews, and your position is eliminated in the end. The formula has always been motivated action equals great results equals having control of my life and destiny. Until it just no longer is...

Toward the end of college I started to realize that things didn't always go according to plan even though I planned, prepared, and carried out all the right steps. The world is not my oyster and that was an eye opener for me. It was frustrating because I didn't know what else I could do. I felt at the mercy and whim of the world or other people around me. And after I graduated from college of course it only got worse. Welcome to the real world! It's called life! ;)

It took me a long time to realize that the only way to remain in control was to actually give up the idea that I was in control in the first place. It's important to do all the right things anyway, but I had to shift my thinking from expecting formulaic results from my actions. Instead, I view it more as creating my own luck. I may not see the results immediately, but on a whole, things will add up in the end. The more control you give up, ironically, the more control you actually have and the more you are in control. It's about being able to account for and deal with the unexpected that will arise. That is the true meaning of being in control - being okay with knowing you really don't have any at all.

The only thing a person really has control over are their own actions, thoughts, behaviors, and reactions. But that's really all you need to navigate this world. No matter how difficult the turmoil, you can always view it and deal with it in a positive, healthy, and enriching manner. Find a way to learn something and become a better person in all your trials and tribulations. What else do you have to lose?

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