Answering Reader Mail: How to Be A Great Gatekeeper

A friend of a friend wrote the following email. "I've been working for my boss for 4 years and he is very happy with me. Yet, there is one thing that has been brought up for a couple of years now and I seemingly have not mastered that yet. I need to learn how to be a better gatekeeper. In the beginning my boss had an open door policy, but that seems not to be suitable anymore. The workload has increased and my boss can't be constantly interrupted. If you could give me your insight on that particular issue that would be great."

Dear BH,

What a great question! Here is my advice to you.

1) As an executive assistant/gatekeeper, you should always know where your boss is and what they are doing. Your number one goal is to constantly be aware. To be a great gatekeeper you have to be informed and alert. When people start walking anywhere near your desk or your boss's desk, always look up from the computer and make eye contact or give a verbal acknowledgment. This should start as soon as anyone is about 5ft away. Granted, you'll sometimes look up and people are just walking by, but if you don't start engaging someone before they get too close you'll find they will walk right past you and walk into your boss' office since they are used to the open door policy. So it is your job to look up, say hi, maybe chat a little, and ask if they need your boss. If they do and you know your boss can't see them say any of the following:

I'm so sorry. He's:

on a conference call.
wrapping up a meeting.
on a deadline right now.
in the middle of a project.
not available right now.
visiting/checking in on his direct reports.

Then ask:
How much time do you need? 2 min, 10 min, 30 min or an hour?
How urgent is it? Can he get back to you this by the end of today, tomorrow, the week?
What is it regarding, which project?

And get back to them as appropriate. Even if you don't have an answer yet feel free to write an email three days in a row saying:

I haven't forgotten about you. I'm still finding your answer/a good time to squeeze you in. Feel free to check back with me frequently.

2) To be a gatekeeper, you should be at your desk as much as possible especially when you are still training your co-workers and colleagues about the new unspoken closed door policy. The only time you should leave your desk is for lunch, to use the restroom, and for any requests your boss makes of you directly. The more often you are gone for 10 min here or 30 min there the more chances anyone can walk into your boss' office because they think it's still okay.

3) If you find that your boss is very busy and doesn't want to see someone a good tactic is getting into the habit of escorting people around. What I mean by this is slyly physically blocking or encouraging someone to take your lead and follow you where you want them to. For example:

Say you know a particular person can be quite pushy. As soon as they start walking toward your desk or your boss' office get out from behind your desk and start walking toward them to greet them. Try to make them stop and engage them to talk to you by saying, "Did you need _________?"

If they say yes, tell them "Give me a second and let me go see if he's free" and hopefully they stay put.

Even if they try to follow you or barge in, still go into your boss' office and announce their presence even though that person is standing right next to you. Say, "_________ is here to see you. Is now a good time?"

And your boss can say yes or no.

If your boss says no it's now your job as the MESSENGER/ESCORT to say, "Why don't you follow me to my desk and I'll try to find a better time for you," thus leading them out of your boss' office.

The goal is for YOU to be the FIRST AND LAST person anyone ever deals with regarding your boss. This can be as minute as saying hello and goodbye and walking them to the front door or hallway. This trains anyone that you are the gatekeeper.

Escorting also helps you get more face time with your boss to get answers you need when he already has a packed schedule. A good tactic is to walk him to and from scheduled meetings. That usually takes 2-5 minutes and you are able to ask questions as you walk and talk. It should go without saying that you should not follow your boss if you think he may be going to the restroom or coming back from the restroom.

4) Always be humble, apologetic, and validate the other person's request to see your boss, especially if the meeting has already been set and you have to cancel. Oftentimes, being a great gatekeeper means having to say "things changed," "not right now," a lot or even no, but without making them feel less important or saying no outright. To do this always be firm, but full of sorrow and regret. You can say the following.

"Oh I'm so sorry. I know you're really busy too and you need _________. Let me see if I can move things around."

Sometimes you can, sometimes you can't, but you want to communicate that you will try.

"__________ isn't available right now, but I'll be sure to tell him you stopped by. I hate to have inconvenienced you. Many apologies."

"There's been a last-minute change in his schedule. We feel terrible."

5) When all else fails and your boss is really on a tight deadline, he or you should close his door for a set amount of time - an hour, three hours and the both of you should discuss who he can be interrupted for. If your boss doesn't already have a VIP list of people who ALWAYS have access to him, start drafting that now. It can include anyone such as his boss, investors, his family, or specific people that are working on the same project he is.

Hopefully you already answer the phone for your boss and and all meeting requests automatically come to you. As gatekeeper, you should control the flow of communication and time management of your boss' schedule with his input. Oftentimes, as the gatekeeper, you have even a larger portion of control with what's going on because only you know the minute details of what's going to happen later in the day or next week. Mutual trust and cooperation between you and your boss are key to finding the right rhythm and style for the both of you. I hope this helps, BH!

Chatroulette as a Tool for Self Discovery & Introspection

I started seeing articles about Chatroulette a week ago and started skimming them over. It wasn't until Ashton Kutcher started using it that I decided to take a peek based on the article wondering if he could do for Chatroulette what he did for Twitter. Before I delved in, I read a couple more articles and finally jumped in. (For anyone unfamiliar with Chatroulette, the novelty of it is to be paired up with random strangers all over the world for webcam and text chat sessions. It's a bare-bones operation. The only function there is, is the ability to hit "NEXT" to move on to the next stranger. Also be warned, it's not for minors - there's too much unnecessary nudity whether as pranks or purposeful.)

I was sick all weekend and figured now was the time to try it since I had nothing to do and was extremely bored after being a homebody. It was quite an interesting and even jarring experience. This is what to expect and what I learned about myself...

1) If you're extremely cautious, Chatroulette might not be for you.

To use your webcam, you have to realize people may take screenshots or record the chat sessions. So as soon as you are connected to someone they have access to your image, voice, and video - even if only for those 5 seconds before either one of you hits next. Funny or odd chat sessions end up pasted on the web for the world to see, fortunately or unfortunately.

2) It's a test in rejection and patience.

When I first logged on, the first few people had video cameras but the screen was all black either because the camera hadn't kicked in or they were really sitting in the pitch black. All those people I just nexted since I couldn't tell if it was a technical glitch. I started seeing way too much nudity so I would hit next as well. And then, I started to get rejected. And I would wonder - is it my looks, does my babyface make me look younger, do people think I don't speak English because I'm Asian? LOL (I only saw a handful of Asians online.) So when you realize this is how it works, the first five seconds you're connected to someone new, both parties usually just sit there blinking and staring back. And I realized we're both waiting for the other person to either hit next or finally say hi. LOL

3) Chat sessions vary in length and are pretty mundane.

When you're not hitting next for 15 minutes, you finally land in a chat session where someone wants to chat. My longest session was probably 15 minutes and it's the typical - where are you from, what time is it there? It's very much a Seinfeld episode.

I once chatted with 4 college boys and they jokingly started the session by saying, "Herro." I laughed and said, "I speak English! I'm in Cali" and it turned out they were from Santa Barbara. It was an okay conversation. Chatroulette is very much a novelty item that wears off after trying it for a day or two.

4) The connection is a bit unstable sometimes.

Be prepared to have a nice normal conversation and then your webcam freezes or your text box won't work anymore. And then you're forced to hit next or visit the home page again thus losing the connection. And once that happens, there's no being able to find that stranger again. That wasn't such a big deal because I didn't really see the need or have the desire to keep in touch with random strangers, but I realized I felt SO BAD thinking they thought I rejected them or just outright ditched them mid-way thru a conversation.

5) Be mindful of what your webcam can see.

During a session when my webcam worked, but my text field didn't, I resorted to writing something down and then showing my pad of paper to the camera so they would realize I was having technical difficulties. I'd write things like, "frozen" "can't type" and eventually "bye? :(" A minute later, I realized the pad of paper I chose was my old work stationery that had my full name on it and (old) work phone number. Granted, the likelihood of that guy saving our chat session or seeing that information is unlikely, but it gave me pause to what else might be in the background of my webcam. Luckily, I was at my dining room table so the most comments I got were "nice microwave" because that's all they could see.

These are the thoughts that went thru my mind during my experience.

-You look young. If you look or are under 21, I don't need to talk to you.

-Am I one of the oldest people on here? Everyone looks like a teen or a college student. I'm defintely not.

-Will I find someone in Los Angeles, someone I know, or get paired with a celebrity?

-How many non-English speakers are on here?! (I spoke to some people in China who couldn't really understand English although he could type "You are very cute." So we chatted in Japanese. He was also married and his wife and friends were in the room so I waved hello. LOL)

-Even if you ask nicely, no nudity here.

-Where are all the normal non-drunk, non-high people?

-I think I'm too boring for this site. Or maybe it's because I'm sober.

So try Chatroulette for fun if you're really bored. And listen to all the questions you ask yourself quietly when you hit next, or when the stranger decides to skip over you.

Answering Reader Mail: Before I Move to LA

MJ recently wrote me and asked, "I want to start on a road similar to the one you started about nine years ago. Move to LA and get a job in the industry. My question to you is is there anything else I can do or should be doing in my time before moving to LA that will make it easier for me to get a job when I am there? Any feedback or insight you can provide me would be greatly appreciated."

Dear MJ,

Thank you so much for reading my blog. I am glad you enjoy it. I hope I can be of help and that you find what you are looking for once you move here.

Here are a few things I suggest.

1) Meet a lot of people who are/were in the industry and pick their brains.

The goal of this project isn't so much to network, but to gather information via informational interviews. The point of the informational interview is to find out how they got started, what advice they would give you, get realistic expectations of what your first job in the industry could be, get a feel for what to expect, have them critique your resume, and really gauge if it's something you want to do. The entertainment industry isn't for the faint of heart and the competition will be tough. The more people you meet and the more well-rounded view you get, the better off you are. You'll learn that if people can and want to help you, they will offer it as well. However, always keep in mind that you are there to LEARN from them and their experiences regardless of which position they had or which part of the industry they worked in.

2) If you aren't doing the EXACT job you already want in Hollywood, sometimes starting out as an assistant really is the way to get to the top. So, try to get on a good fast-paced busy desk, preferably related to Hollywood, if not, at least a solid assistant gig.

Obviously, the best way to get any job at a new company, is to have already done the very same thing at a different or a comparable company. Failing that, try to get the job one rank lower than the one you want. But since Hollywood has no set career path...

Regardless if you want to be on the creative or business side of Hollywood, a lot of people have worked and clawed their way to the top via talent agency mailrooms or being an assistant. It takes a lot of humility to get someone coffee and stand a copy machine for 2 hours a day. The benefit of being someone's office assistant and not a PA is that being in an office or corporate environment warrants you to be a little be more polished, professional, and have basic business acumen. It demonstrates that you can be the face of the company, work with all levels and backgrounds of people, and can do basic admin tasks really well under pressure. It isn't a joke when one is asked in a job interview if you know how to roll calls.

3) Understand the LA culture and the city's infrastructure and how it will affect your daily life.

The realities of living in LA are sometimes a shock to people that move here. The public transportation is lacking, traffic is really horrendous, and how far you live away from where you are trying to land a job can sometimes be a factor. People are notoriously flaky, if your friends live far away - chances are you'll never see them, you MUST have a car to live here. On the flip side, the weather is great, there is a lot to do, and it's a very diverse city.

Have an idea which part of the LA county you want to live in, know how much rent you can afford, and which companies you want to work at and where they are located.

4) Grow your network and spread the word you are looking to relocate to LA.

Your best bet on finding a job is through people you already know or people you can forge strong ties with - this includes family, friends, people from church, your university, any sports teams you play on, etc... People who know you well and can vouch for you are more likely and able to help you out the best. And you never know when someone you know, knows someone else who may be able to help you.

Don't neglect using sites like Brazen Careerist, LinkedIn, Monster, Facebook, Twitter, and Meetup to find people who can help you, who you can help, and people with your same questions.

5) Learn to cultivate hope, strength, and re-evaluation skills. Read a lot of industry & business books.

Because competition is so fierce, it's important to stay mentally and emotionally strong. It's equally crucial to constantly re-evaluate what's working in your life and career and what's not working. Everything that happens at work you bring home and everything that happens at home you bring to work. Since this blog is more about career, I'll stick to the basic tasks such as always updating your resume, being aligned with your career goals, staying in touch with your network, and finding ways to learn new skills, meet new people, or understand your role and how it fits into your department, company, and Hollywood.

The #1 book I recommend to you and someone in your situation: Good In A Room by Stephanie Palmer

Bouncing Back

This weekend I went to my first Cirque Du Soleil show - Kooza - in Santa Monica. It was the very last show of the tour, on the very last day, at the very last show time, 5pm. I had a great time with my date and ran through the whole gamut of emotions. The most exciting parts were the tight rope walk and the cylinder performers.

For each of those stunts, as practiced and polished the performers were, the highlights of each act were when the tight rope walker lost his balance and almost fell, but caught himself, or when the cylinder runner almost tripped on his own feet and could've fallen from two stories up without any safety precautions to save him. My date and I were talking about how each mistake made the feat more impressive because they almost did fall or perhaps die, but each time, they shook it off and righted themself and tried again. Such pressure for the Cirque performers on their very last show... We had more respect and were in awe of watching them recover and do it perfect the second time, then if they were to do it perfectly the first time.

And that to me is what life is all about. As adults and non-perfect beings, what matters is bouncing back. That's what counts. Everyone makes mistakes. How do you recover? How do you learn? How do you move on? How do you forgive/forget? How do you prevent the same thing from happening again? That is what matters. That is what makes us human. That is what redeems us.

As I go through life and sometimes stumble or wonder what I could do differently, I already know I did the best I could, at that time, with the information and knowledge I had then. No regrets. Should I make another similar mistake, my goal is to analyze what was slightly different, what didn't I catch, and how can I think it through and act differently this time?

All too often as I commiserate with my friends over life's dilemmas, I rejoice in how well I know myself, what I want, and how proactive I try to be in getting myself to where I want to be. All too often, not knowing is the first dilemma. Without that foundation, one is muddling through life.

I'm bouncing back and things are great. I only hope -------l is also. I wish you great things, great lessons, and great happiness for the holiday season and new year. Life is too short to be lost.

Faith is Half.com (Why Half.com is my Best Friend)

I just ordered the book HOW TO STOP WORRYING AND START LIVING by Dale Carnegie. A good friend of mine just finished it and spoke highly of it. The great news is, I have one of the main concepts down - imagine the worst-case outcome of an ordeal and figure out how you can move on from there. I've been doing that all my life, unknowingly. After reading books by Donald Trump, I realized he does the same too, especially when making business decisions. However, this doesn't mean I don't ever worry. I've cut down a lot since a teenager. I now try to severely limit wasting any emotional energy on things I can't control.

I bought the book today because it made me think of a concept I've read about recently. I can't remember which book since I read 3-4 at a time. Anyway, the concept mentioned bad times won't last forever and good times won't either; life is always in a state of change and flux. So then it dawned on me that while I've learned to stop worrying about scenario A, B, or C - the very slight annoyance I get with my private life now comes down to how do I reframe an inkling of a worry when I don't know what's going on due to a lack information from the person/event I'm worried about.

I'll give you a real life example. I live in Los Angeles and the running joke is everyone is flaky. Of course being the person I am, I'm usually 15 minutes early to meet friends. So when people are late, I've actually been sitting there a really long time. And when someone is 5 minutes late, I wonder where they are. When they are 10 minutes late I want to call them. But I want to give them the benefit of the doubt and I wonder why they haven't called me. And when they are 15 minutes late I wonder if they are even going to show because who doesn't call when they are running late?! They probably forgot our dinner for all I know. (I will call after 15 min though.)

I also worry if they got in a car accident or are tied down/super stressed at work and totally lost track of time or if an emergency arose. However, while sitting there for 30 minutes I always debate with myself HOW should I feel - annoyed, worried, angry, calm, or happy to have extra time for myself?

I've trained myself to not think anything until my friend shows up or calls because I want to have the "fair/justified" reaction. What ends up happening is I text friends and kill time while refraining very hard from having any reaction because everyone's allowed to be late on occasion even though I try never to be.

One time me and a group of friends were expecting 2-3 others and they never showed up. We called and left a message and kept calling because their behavior was highly unusual. We finally heard back a couple days later and while their reasoning was understandable they didn't show, I thought it was incredibly rude to fall off the face of the earth for that long. At least send a text! "I can't come. Something came up. Can't explain now. Touch base with you on Tuesday."

From the time I realize a situation is "out of place" to when I know why and what caused it is the conundrum. When people semi-disappear I worry a little because I don't know what is what. I want to give people space, breathing room, and don't want to add any more stress to their life; I get the world doesn't revolve around me. I also wonder how I can help. Then I wonder if I need to think about implementing those strategies I devised when I decided NOT to worry and envisioned THE WORST THING POSSIBLE happening. If the other party can't or won't communicate with me, when do I know it's time to put my strategy to use and move on with my life?

I'm very good at closure and being proactive in life. I'm less great at waiting, being kept in the dark, and wondering. How long is too long to wait for an explanation that may never come because someone is busy, depressed, or being evasive? And to make myself feel better and not fear the worst, I buy books like Dale Carnegie's and write posts like this. :) See - I feel better already. I just hope *******L is fine.

Google Voice: Wave of the Future & Love at First Sight

I love Google. I FINALLY got my new Google Voice number. It's invite only and low and behold, I got home late last night and saw in my Google mail box that I was granted to pick my own phone number! After searching for a really long time (an hour), I finally picked the perfect number. I'm very pleased as it has meaning and is easy for me to remember, and should be for those that know me well! ;)

I played with my Google Voice account for a couple of hours. Testing it, seeing how it worked, reading online about all the cool features. I am just blown away by the speed, reliability, innovation, and endless possibilities. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT!

For those of you unfamiliar with Google Voice, it's a free service where you can pick your own phone number that will ring any of your other phones - cell, home, work, etc... so that people don't have to try calling you at all your different numbers or keep updating their address books any time you move. All voicemails are transcribed to emails and you can keep them forever!

http://www.google.com/googlevoice/about.html

They also have a widget feature online so people can call you directly without you having to reveal your phone number. Just embed the widget on your business website, blog, or personal home page. People can call you directly without your privacy or safety being in danger. (You can pick an area code anywhere in the USA even if you don't live there.)

There are so many features that I haven't even explored yet - conference calls, switching phones in the middle of call, and perhaps even doing your laundry! ;)

Get your Google Voice number now! You don't want to have to buy one off eBay for $1000, now do you?

The Pitfalls of Working in the Entertainment Industry

I think most people within the industry and outside of it can be blinded by the glitz and the glamour of what we do at work each day. There's horror stories, drama, and no shortage of problems that give us pride when we are able to solve them and overcome insurmountable obstacles. The industry isn't for the faint of heart and it takes a particular personality to survive it. The pitfall is revealed once a person leaves their oyster or tries to explore life outside of Hollywood and the entertainment industry. I'll give you three examples.

Writer's Block

It's already 425pm and I couldn't really think of anything to write. I'm looking forward to Monday. I have something after work. One of my newest recruiters called some of my references and was really pleased. I am pretty happy he's my recruiter; he's very good at personalized attention and tailoring comments to me specifically. I have a busy week ahead of me as usual. Sometimes, despite a busy day, there's not much to share, or knowledge to impart, or a lesson to be learned. I won't fret my blog today will be very short. But I did want to write to make the effort. Instead, I'll end with a quote...

Indoor Rock Climbing Helps My Career

Anyone who knows me well knows I hate taking risks, unless they are very very calculated. I also am not very daring when it comes to sports and hobbies. Oddly, I've always wanted to try indoor rock climbing and finally did last December. It was such a thrill and quite cerebral too.

I didn't really know what to expect and figured I'd either totally love it or totally hate it. I don't have a great fear of heights so I wasn't too concerned about that. I'm pretty petite so I was more concerned about the strength I may not have for it. I think more than anything was any embarrassment I might have in not doing well since it was a group of six and I knew one person only slightly. For those of you that have never done indoor rock climbing, the surprising element to me was how strategic and emotionally, psychologically, and physically challenging it was.

3 Signs of Good Corporate Culture

I've been extremely fortunate in all of my jobs in my career. I have worked for the most down-to-earth, egoless, kind people. In my industry, this seems like an exception to the rule, although good business sense dictates this is how supervisors and colleagues should be for the best work environment and professional relationships.

It's very hard to read the corporate culture of a company unless you're already working there and have been there for awhile. I always believed one year at a company will give you a full picture since you're able to observe when the company experiences down time in the summer or has insane deadlines during periods of peak productivity. Only time will tell is the correct adage in this case.

I have noticed three criteria of a good company during my years as a staff member and freelancer/contractor before getting hire, while working there, and upon finishing a contract job.

My Reflections of 9/11

The year 9/11 happened, I was actually living in New York for the summer. I won a prestigious fellowship with the International Radio & Television Society. I say won because it really was like winning the lottery. Every year 35 college students are picked from across the nation. Hundreds apply for a chance at living rent-free in New York, getting an entertainment internship, a paycheck, access to network with all the big wigs in the city, expenses-paid dinners, concerts, and activities, and the chance to be groomed through what I call entertainment boot camp. The process was long and arduous. You had to apply a year in advance, fill out a 20-page questionnaire, write a personal essay, and pass 2 phone interviews. I later found out the year I applied over 1000 people applied. I was one of the lucky few to be chosen and only the 2nd or 3rd to attend from my university since its inception.

Insights From A Recruiting Perspective

I've held a handful of positions relating to recruiting applicants, talent acquisition, or interacting with HR personnel and senior HR executives. I thought I'd share some insights from my various experiences about working from the inside.

Answering Reader Mail: Finding Temp Agencies in Los Angeles

JH recently wrote me and asked the following question, "With so many temp agencies out there, I don't know which is/isn't good. I was wondering if you could give me the name of the temp agency you worked with. Thanks so much in advance!"

How I Broke The #1 Rule As A Temp & Lived To Tell It

A great way to get your foot in the door with a company is to be a temporary assistant. You fill in for people if they are sick, on vacation, or on maternity leave. The assignments can last for a day or two to even a couple of months. The best part is, there are a ton of temp agencies and anyone can apply. I had zero connections in Hollywood, so this is how I got my start.

The Difficulties of Blogging Daily & Networking

As you know, I'm new to the blogging world. Penelope wasn't lying when she said the biggest challenge is to have something great to write every single day. I've only been doing this for 2 weeks and I'm fast running out of ideas on what to write about.

Although I love my life, I don't think something special happens every day. Mix in the fact that I'm slightly annoyed at life that I don't want to write about anything I'm annoyed about cause I'll completely forget why I was annoyed in about 3 days! LOL So why record inconsequential details? What's surprising is nothing ever annoys me and for the past week little things have been getting on my nerves. It will be some minute incident in the day and the very next day something else will happen that I've realized I've never been this annoyed in I can't remember when!

Only 3 Things Are Needed To Be Happy / DJ AM

Whenever you are in a funk and aren't sure what to do to pull yourself out of it, focus on three specific areas that will truly make a difference in your life. Gordon Livingston, M.D., speaks from lot of experience - both personally and professionally. He's one of my favorite authors.

Gordon says you only need three things to be happy.

The True Meaning Of Being In Control

I assume most people on the Brazen Careerist network are go-getters, initiators, and passionate about their career and going after what they want much like myself. From a young age, I've been working and have sought out opportunities to learn and grow. It was always instilled in me that through hard work and sheer persistence, I could get what I wanted. It's what I was told and it's what I was rewarded out in the real world time and time again.

The difficulty arises when what you've been doing all your life no longer starts working through no fault of your own. For example, getting laid off due to a world wide economic crisis. You beat out all the other candidates to get your job, you work hard with rave reviews, and your position is eliminated in the end. The formula has always been motivated action equals great results equals having control of my life and destiny. Until it just no longer is...

Often The Why Of Something Is Irrelevant

Since the economy crashed and thousands have become unemployed, many might have questioned, "why me?!" even though they were dedicated, hard workers. The fact that job stability doesn't exist and lay offs seem inevitable or random can be very disconcerting. Most become mired in the whys and how could this have happened to me cycle.

Fortunately or unfortunately, almost every single company that I've ever worked at has either been bought out or merged. Luckily, I was unaffected most of the time, but the sense of doom and low morale in the company always prevailed. Before I even graduated college, the idea of zero job stability was already on my horizon.

Why People Don't Change

During a three-hour conversation not too long ago, a friend and I briefly discussed what it means to truly be an adult. He remarked, for him, there was nothing definitive about adulthood and it was more of a gradual process. For me, it was hitting a milestone birthday and realizing the world didn't see me as a kid anymore and any mistakes I would make could no longer be blamed on youth or naivete.

One of the more difficult realizations as an adult for me was learning a great majority of the population hates change. Even when you think whatever really bad situation they are in now couldn't be any worse than death, hell, or what have you, most people refuse to take action and instead stay in the same horrible circumstance day in and day out.

I could never relate to this way of thinking or living life as I'm very much about learning, growing, and being the best person I can be. Granted, I may take some time to figure out a strategy or think things through to best conquer a situation, but that mental thinking through process is still action, awareness, and productivity. I want to live the best life I can, while I can, as I understand life is very short. So to sit back and do nothing, and waste each day away is one of the biggest insults of mankind to humanity.

I researched this, trying to understand why some people act and others don't. It took me a couple of books to find the most concise answer and reasoning behind why people refuse change. And here is the truth:

The Worst Mistake Women Can Make

Slowly a lot of my friends are getting married and bearing children. One of the most neglected areas of discussion and thought are finances and looking at the big picture amid the excitement of wedding planning and greeting the joys of parenthood.

Among my group of friends who are mothers, some work and some don't. My sister is also hoping to have children soon and we had a passionate debate about why it's very important to keep working, at least part-time, even if you have young children. She didn't think it was a big deal or necessary if the husband made enough so the wife didn't have to work. I took the other stance.

Interview Attire For Hollywood & Other Non-Traditional Jobs

For my entire career I've been dressing up the same way for a job interview in Hollywood. I wear what I call the "publicist's outfit." What is the publicist outfit? An all black suit, black purse, black portfolio, black pointy-toe heels, flats or boots, and a non-black collared shirt with at least the first button undone so it creates a V-neck shape for my necklace to show through.

How & Where Do I Find More Job Leads?

I'd like to think of myself as having a lot of initiative, creating my own luck, and being pretty good at networking. Often, my hard work, optimism, and drive pays off in job leads, but since I'm looking for the RIGHT job, it's been a long journey. I'm curious what else I could be doing.

Despite never having any background or experience in recruiting, I was offered a four-month contract job as a senior coordinator which I happily took. The great thing about the job is I learned what it's like to be on the other side. I loved being a cheerleader for the company and helping people get hired. One of the unexpected surprises was that once my contract ended all the recruiters that I worked with said I did well and offered to help me with my job hunt too! They are all extremely gracious and kind! Herein also lies my difficulty in what else I could be doing - when I have several recruiters/HR people who are keeping their ears open for me half my work is done. The entertainment industry is so small that these people also know everyone else in recruiting or HR too. I check in with them periodically to see if they've seen the latest movie we both helped staff or how my job hunt is going or if they'll be in LA soon so we can go to lunch, etc. So I'm covered at the central hub.

Is My Career Specialty TOO Specific?

I've been reading a lot that having a specialty or a niche is very important. The idea is to be an expert or the top candidate in your field so you become the "go to" person. The last thing you should want is to be good at everything because then you aren't really good at any one thing.

My first job after college was working for a Chairman/CEO. And then I got laid off in a merger. However, even after the first CEO I was pegged as "the assistant to CEOs." So be warned - often unfairly, the first job you take out of college becomes your specialty.

How A Thank You Card Launched My Career

I've been very lucky my entire career with having wonderful bosses and co-workers and being consistently groomed in the same way by all my superiors. It has allowed me to be in the entertainment industry for almost 9 years now.

While on a job interview not too long ago, I was asked how I ended up working for everyone I have and how I got started in the industry. My first answer was, "No nepotism here!" but the more serious answer is I did A LOT of internships, I started on my career early, and I did it through hard work because I had ZERO connections in Hollywood. Yes, ZERO. I've found every single one of my jobs through a temping agency. But in reality - the most useful skill that opened a lot of doors for me were my soft skills.

A Noteworthy Lesson on Movie Distribution Anyone Can Use & How It Affects Your Haircut

As a high-level executive assistant in the entertainment industry, most of my friends are in the biz. And most of my career being at film studios, it's obvious I love watching movies. I think this weekend was an extreme example. And it's the first time I've done such a thing. Here's an edited snapshot of my weekend.

Fri - dinner & Inglourious Basterds (loved it)
Sat - dinner & Post Grad (eh...)
Sun - dinner & Cold Souls (eh...)

Now, the lesson here is that before you go watch a movie, pay attention to which theatre # it's in and how long the movie has been out. Why? Because if the movie is in theatre #10 on opening weekend that's a bad sign.

Is there a profession that DOESN'T need a blog?

I started my blog because I love Penelope's posts. I agree almost 100% of the time with her. However, I'm wondering if I need a blog. I'm a high-level executive assistant, in the entertainment industry, and I've been lucky enough to be headhunted by Fortune 75 companies through word of mouth or finding my LinkedIn profile.

The question I'm really asking is, "Do I need to blog?" because I'm at a loss of what to write. And is there a point in expending so much energy in a life-long project that may not have any positive benefit? I feel like I may not fit the typical demographic of bloggers. I like being a career executive assistant, I like working from nine to six, I even enjoy overtime as long as it doesn't top 55 hrs a week. And I feel as though most people who have a blog want to be freelancers or their own boss, which I don't.

Book Review: Womenomics: Write Your Own Rules for Success by Claire Shipman & Katty Kay

This book is not just for women! - 5/5 stars

I just finished reading this book the other day and I strongly encourage everyone to read it whether you are a young professional, an HR manager, or even just a regular employee. This book sheds a lot of light on the struggles many working professionals have. How does one balance work and life?

Book Review: Good In A Room by Stephanie Palmer

A MUST-READ FOR EVERYONE and ANYONE - 5/5 stars

Before I explain why this is an excellent book, I'll give you some relevant background information.

I spent 6 years working directly for three well-known, high-profile, respected Chairman/CEO billionaires within the business and entertainment industries. What Stephanie writes is EXACTLY what I observed day in and day out, firsthand and up close, every single day. Her book provides the insight, rationale, and step-by-step business etiquette that most people don't have the opportunity to learn, practice, or get exposed to. I was extremely grateful and lucky in that regard. Stephanie's book closes the gap of the age old catch-22. To get invited into the room, one needs to have a lot of experience, to get experience one needs to constantly have successful meetings.